There's literally no limit to what can happen when someone loses their mind.  (You may have noticed that, like, everywhere lately.  If not, you frighten me.)  So, I hope the O'Reilly Auto Parts store in Longmont can forgive me while I breathe a sigh of relief that this is all that happened... and perhaps chuckle a little because of the oddity of this story.

Apparently, 33-year-old James Kramer bought a whip from an adult novelty store.  Now, you would expect something interesting to happen next, and it did.  He brought his new toy over to O'Reilly Auto Parts and used it to make their day a lot less convenient, by cutting the power to the store.  Longmont Police found the Fantasy Series Metal Beaded Flogger jammed into the breaker box.

The O'Reilly guys are probably glad it didn't get worse for them, because less than an hour later, police got a report of a guy "acting oddly" and who had stolen the hubcaps, gas cap, and windshield wipers from the company van of another business nearby.

An employee at that business saw this happen and managed to get Kramer to come inside (while he called authorities.)  That's when Kramer started swinging at this guy with a garden hoe.  The man was able to run outside.  Kramer did, too... but ran off.

Police caught him a short time later, and he's now in Boulder County Jail, facing charges that also stem from damaging a fence in Longmont the previous day.

A whip, a hoe... and car parts.  I can't help but feel that somewhere, there's a woman who would fall madly in love with this guy.


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